Just how to Put Love Center Stage When Your Kid Comes Out As LGBTQ

[Micheal Jorden]

Recently LGBTQ kids from the streets of Russia to communities all over the world have observed a nation arresting its own citizens to be gay. In Uganda a law was passed making homosexuality illegal. The law also provides long prison sentences for anybody who supports the civil rights of LGBTQ people or offers them aid. Not just is it illegal to be gay, it's illegal never to report someone you suspect to be gay. It reminds me of Nazi Germany.

Right within America, we witnessed a father of an accomplished NFL draft pick express his disapproval of his son when he arrived as gay. Reading Michael Sam, Sr.'s response to his son's developing breaks my heart. I am aware first-hand the long-term impact that kind of response is wearing our LGBTQ kids. It affects their self-esteem and can cause depression and substance abuse and sometimes, even suicide attempts.

In sharp contrast to Michael Sam's father, LGBTQ kids all over the world saw a robust style of parental acceptance when Magic and Cookie Johnson shared their love for their openly gay son on the Oprah's Next Chapter Program on the OWN television network.

Oprah asked whether or not they knew their son was gay. I so related to Cookie. Like a mom, she suspected from a very early age. "He's your child. You love your child and you support your child, no real matter what they are. Being a mom, I knew." Cookie said. Magic said, "It absolutely was a shock at first but also I knew." Magic relays he told his son, "E.J., I love you so I'm going to guide you regardless of what... He wanted my approval. He wanted my support."

If perhaps all LGBTQ youth had that kind of support from their parents when they come out. Sadly, that is not the case. Even though parents love their kids no real matter what, as Magic said, it can be a shock at first and parents may need to go through an amount of adjustment. During that point, their LGBTQ child may feel rejected even when that is not the parent's intent. So much can be carried out to alleviate those feelings and to greatly help the parents move along their path and build a connection to understanding and acceptance in a way that supports the parents and the LGBTQ youth.

For folks who love their child and want to know, you will find tools available to maneuver toward acceptance and understanding. Love denied is a tragedy, and it's time to create in the healing. Parents and LGBTQ youth continue steadily to struggle. Here are a few ideas to lay the foundation.

 

1. Begin by acknowledging and accepting where you are. If you don't start there, you won't manage to move beyond it.
   
2. Be courageous and open in discussing uncomfortable topics with one another.
   
3. Show compassion and caring in your communications which means you is going to be heard and understood. Communicating out of anger, frustration and disappointment stops the message you are trying to deliver from being heard.
   
4. Be patient with yourself and one another. LGBTQ safe It takes time to adjust one's expectations and there's no one way and no one right way. Everyone has a unique path.
   
5. Trust yourself, your feelings, and who you are. Once the foundation of love remains, you are able to trust that you will be able to build a connection back to understanding and acceptance.z