Instead they thought something is wrong with them and with their way of thinking. They became angry and frustrated with themselves for being depressed without obvious reasons, having anxiety attacks that don't make any sense, and for being 'utterly defective'. What some professionals easily overlook is that the 'average' person does not link her/his emotional state today to experiences they had 30 years ago and which they might have partly forgotten. sexual abuse hamilton
When health professionals do not take a thorough personal history and ask if the person has experienced any forms of abuse, survivors will not know the right questions to ask that give them access to the help they need. More often than not they don't really know what they might need. Their lack of understanding the origins of their problems was compounded when they approached public mental health services' for help. Research has shown that public mental health services don't always inquire about a person's history of sexual, physical, or emotional abuse.
By the age of ten most young children have a fairly good idea of what's going on. As parents we owe it to them to set them straight before they start trading in the rumors of middle school when they start to hide within their social shell and communication on the subject becomes difficult. By talking frankly to your children you are arming them with the shield of knowledge, self confidence and the ability to protect themselves. Child sexual abuse as a subject needs to be dragged into the sunlight and dealt with as the reality that it is. We have to face the issue head on in order to learn how to eliminate it as a threat to our families and friends. We must face it publicly so the perpetrators of this iniquitous behavior know that they are "on notice", that they cannot prey on our young. sexual assault hamilton
The invisibility of CSA in society and in mental health settings combined with survivors' childhood conditioning of being silenced, their coping strategies of avoidance and dissociation, families and friends' limits of knowing how to deal with survivors' pain and disorganized life, and the inability to link the problems survivors have to their experiences of abuse prevent people not only from being effective in seeking professional help but also from themselves from future emotional, physical, or sexual harm.
Sexual abuse harms a person in many different ways. How deeply a person is affected by sexual abuse depends on a number of variants. In general we can say that the impacts of abuse depends on the age of the child, the relationship between child and perpetrator, the frequency, the duration, the severity, the presence of threats, and the availability of support and care. Most survivors who seek help struggle with cognitive contamination, impaired social functioning, impaired memory processing, negative self-relations and identity, learned helplessness, physical health problems i.e. irritable bowel syndrome, sleep disturbances, disordered eating, mood disturbances, abuse of drugs and alcohol, to name just the most obvious. abused sexual hamilton
Talk to your family and friends frequently about the subject. Take personal responsibility for your child; don't delegate it to anyone else. Keep the lines of communication open with your children no matter how hard it can be. That's their lifeline. Encourage your children's school to have someone come and talk to parents about this subject. Finally if you suspect sexual abuse of your children or other children report it immediately.
In essence, the risk of harm can be great causing cause sexual, emotional and physical trauma (either in isolation or together) originating from those supposed to protect, care and help individuals develop but who are in fact causing harm. Abuse is likely to take place within victims' home which should be a place of safety and if perpetrated by those in whom they have placed their care/trust, the risk of not being able to disclose may be greater.
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